you, you're being crazy and it's only hurting me you keep saying nothing's changed but the smile on my face has turned to a frown cause the sound of the word from your mouth no longer coming out for some reason or another lover? i don't know where we're supposed to go let alone what i'm supposed to do but i wanna do it with you if you'd be my girlfriend but the word starts to die and i couldn't tell you why i can only tell you what i feel is true you want independence and yeah i get it but when the sentence ends with question marks my thoughts go dark without my girlfriend i'm losing this title fight and i might lose my mind if you keep keeping your defenses up like seriously, what the fuck? cause if i knew i was hurting you i would so quickly quit it this is me saying mercy i'm tapping out you win it you can have my heart as if you didn't from the start take everything just say you'll be my girlfriend and i'm glad if it just makes you want it more but i'm slipping and i think i'm losing score this is a title fight and i'm going down this round

i spent a hundred days cursing you, wishing you away the things you did, the things you said never thought i could forgive forget for you and me were always and epic contrast a bizarre mismatch a history of contradictions so add another to the books i could not forget the looks we shared in between the sheets that day i hate you sometimes i love you always you contradict everything i know my heads so full yet keeps on growin til i don't know what to say i know you hate that sometimes i love you always i have this nightmare every now and again, that all of our friends are in the bed with us i wake up feeling nuts and then i turn and kiss your face but i'm not sure if you're awake but your body fits right into mine just like puzzle pieces we just make sense even though we're senseless i could sleep in you all day i hate the sunlight i love you always animals in hibernation we wake to fuck, you bite my face you scratch me raw, nails under skin i hate you sometimes i love you always

i saw you at the show with your rock star boyfriend i shot you a hello, a cheap attempt i tried to pretend that i didn't like have a big crush on you back in the day before his band blew up and sometimes i think of you even though i know i wouldn't stand a chance i dont fit in to leather pants and i don't wear eyeliner and baby you've tasted the finer things in life but i saw you at the show with your rock star boyfriend the two of you in the corner all alone i think you were tryin to pretend that you don't occasionally think of me or check out my myspace page to see what life could be like if you stuck to earth for what it's worth i think we live with the same curse because we're opposite sides of the coin but the changes adds up to the same sum we all know everybody but we don't know anyone i don't hold a flame but i know your name i assume you do the same, we're one we all know everybody but we don't know anyone i just wanted to say whats up i saw you at the show with your punk rock makeover and i laughed because i didn't take you for one to rock the big takeover back in the day in was reppin it and you were all up on some emo shit but i did hear you jumped from scene to scene like lilypads you acted like you didn't recognize but i saw you tense up when i walked by don't worry doll i won't rat out your past life and if you stick around long enough in this town everyone you know gets lost and found i just wanted to say whats up i just wanted to say whats up to you

i'm not gonna wait a whole nother year for you to be frank, i should've been over you by october i showed that i cared, and you went your own way left me on my own, great it's not that i need you, i just can't seem to shake it off things were great in april in summer we became stale guess i was tryin to save you you had to do it for yourself but i deserve better again i sing love letters i had your back, you had a year when midnight strikes i'll disappear miss 2008, it's really been great but i'm not gonna pine through 2009 i'll miss 2008 but i won't miss missing you you have until midnight to figure us out go get all nostalgic i know i get heartsick thinking over what i could've told you in different words, in words more well spoken but mine came out broken but at least i was there, and i showed that i care.. i'm repeating myself i'm sorry that i let myself go but know the whole time i was hoping you'd lend me a hand turns out even kings can flop but now i'm back on top and next years gonna be the shit you've got one last chance to be part of it you have until midnight like that one episode of the o.c.

atten hut! pretty baby needs attention now claws out as you spiral, spiral down cause you know at some point you'll snag something and you're feeling unfulfilled like monthly you know he's there and he doesn't even care that you keep on talking about yourself little baby loves attention now don't care from where it comes about communication never was your strong suit but good persuasion could make all other points moot you're not aware, or maybe you don't care but you keep on talkin about yourself so if you don't have eyeglasses you better grow glassy eyed cause this is 0 to the motherfuckin 8 and everybody under 25 needs their parking validated and if you dont have patience you better get a megaphone cause this is L to the motherfuckin A and we left all our manners at home but back to what i was saying... little boy needs attention now cause you know that the show is all about you wave your hands a lot so rescue can save you from an island where nobody wants to hear you and your opinion in every conversation don't they fuckin know who you are? i'm just praying you get every morsel of attention you deserve cause if you don't i'm sure the next time we talk every single word will be about what you've been doin what you've been saying you've been screwing i hate to interrupt you

you get in a funk, you get out of a funk my body's hot with a fever but i ain't sick and my hearing's so tight i hear a pinprick my ian ziering nightlight will never go out and when i grow up, i'm blowin up i'm leavin no doubt no, i don't know where it's all going and no, i don't know whens the next showing and no, it doesn't like, freak me out don't doubt your fear but i do fear the doubt if you know what it's about, you've probably been fooled some go to work and some go to school and some like to stay confused all their lives they wait for an answer that only comes when you die aye aye aye you're never gonna find the answer you're never gonna find the truth in life so just live some live to love, but they don't love to live some give up hope but i hope that you don't give up your spot because you think you've been playing it wrong, nah, you're playin it right, they just don't like your song and so you put on your headphones like "fuck it" nobody has to like it if you love it it's yours! and that's all it's gotta be haters get mad cause they're too blind to see that life's too short to maintain regret in not being able to expand to prog rock dimensions if radio won't play your radio edit make the solo even longer seven minutes in heaven yeah we're gonna be okay you're not the first and you won't be the last to think by talkin big you can outrun your past those ghosts don't go away but they might chill in the attic if you keep your windows clean and let the sun wash out the static

my legs are wrecked and tired as shit i don't regret a moment of it but i do regret not kissing you last night my jaw is tight my lips are raw i don't remember who we saw but i do regret not kissing you last night so can i see you now so i won't lose any more sleep? can i fix whats wrong before i fall in too deep i wanna know if you regret not kissing me last night my face feels odd. did i inhale dirt? i only remember us flirting i do regret not kissing you last night lie awake in bed, no love maybe it could be the drugs but it could be me not kissing you last night so do i call or do i text? i never know what to do next i do regret not kissing you last night i do regret not kissing you last night

lord help me last night i had another dream and i guess it seems you can't promise your mind those kind of things you can frown baby if you want to but gettin down's the best thing that you can do that city's calling out your name and if you find you're wakin up without her its still a new day so why get down about her tomorrows just a dream away i had a dream all good people stayed the same and all the assholes could at least admit they're lame dream of a world without a single poisoned kiss i had a dream it could be better than this, so sue me

you'll never love anyone like you'll love the first one who broke your heart you'll never lust like you lusted over the one who taught you no one can be trusted ill drive 1000 miles ill drive 1000 more in a testosterone box just to obtain the cure and with every empty bottle and every drunken text i'm gettin one mile closer to the one who loves me the best i got a kiss from rock and roll and now i know we're on top, love we're all in on the joke and i'm gonna laugh until the house lights rise i'm a whore for the encore but i swear i'll still act surprised she can't decide when it was she died inside but now they'll all have to cry to catch up with her he never stops self involved, a world of props he covers up his cracks with neon words keep lookin for that window of opportunity not to communicate, no but just to speak your piece with every empty bottle and every drunken text im gettin one mile closer to the one i love the best turn up the bass and disinfect the wound take a shot and pray your salvation comes sooner than the hangover you earned from chasin range rovers with cryptic license plates "boy you only love the chase" she was right once when she split you open but now you've grown, so quit your mopin you've found an out and it comes from within the embrace of a safety pin o brothers, o sisters here's a needle for your blisters behind the speaker lies the pearly gates god is good but the devils great and you should check out his new mixtape he's got one on there bout a pretty place where all good soldiers go

where do we go from here? raise a toast to the death of your childhood fear your little hell came crashing down and the worst that you have found is you were right in thinking that things get fucked sometimes and maybe paranoia pays but it's the cheapest wage rotten food on your plate to make it through the day and yes the sweet things she will say they may very well be fake but they leave a pleasant taste and you will never know for sure anyway i hate to turn down the white noise but we mightve been wrong all this time, boys reset the preset and hit the eject i reject my instinct to detest pain only makes you stronger and helps keep your hard on longer i flip the switch on my nervous twitch lifes a bitch but that aint exactly news let's make another toast this time we're gonna need some limes cause we're drinking the hard shit to bullshit rhymes we drink to numb the pain and to forget her name but we love getting shitface so what the hey? i hate to turn down the white noise but we mightve been wrong all this time, boys reset the preset and hit the eject i reject my instinct to detest and my involuntary need to freak the fuck out when i start to bleed my middle finger just ain't what it used to be she flew her spaceship into the flames a kamikaze mission to prove he's lame he reads her face against the light wondering how she's picking him apart tonight if i died on my way home tonight would you say that we left things alright? and yes the sweet things she will say might all just be the game she plays but let her prove you wrong someday

a slight delayed reaction thoughts caught in transit slap a dull smack to the conversation ripple, dissolve impatiently the astronaut just drifts and drifts the customers should get right pissed apologies-- he's got his own shit like every time we talk on the phone i'm sorry but i seem to find some fossilized bones that i've just got to reconstruct into a model home at the moment but it's just a title fight: me vs. the telephone tonight cattle graze, diverted gazes setting fire to the myth one day our social awkwardness could erect a great monolith of cellophane and pain laid tight with light production value his hooks could rid the world of doom if he could just keep up and every time i'm spacing out at dinner it's not cause of you it's always some lame shitty inner struggle i'm putting myself through like either i never know whether i am pulling it off or eating shit or thinking of a melody that kind of sounds like this

she's leaving on a plane for real this time shedding the pain at the scene of the crime and maybe she's right and in due time the wear and tear will disappear she's leaving him again a broken mess of a superman with a sack lunch of big words too hard to digest restless he wrestles to him its a test that he seems to be taking every year now and i'd love to say go find yourself, but i could really use your help in this valley of hollywood scars i know firsthand it's shitty but when the sun goes down on studio city i'll set chatsworth on fire to show you how pretty you are suburban brush burns fast burns every page but the last and maybe youll escape your past but i'm asking you to stay and let me help you find your way it's not like to heed the things i say but i meant it when i said it we'll figure it out someday find a country where you'll always be right and hold it to those who've hurt you like a hello kitty knife but three or four hours into that flight you're gonna realize that i was the love of your life if i made you a promise that this song was better than all i wrote for you before would you ever consider letting me write you a whole lot more?

city of angels, city of angels clip their wings and watch them fall heres where they seem to settle warlords, whores and troubadours each with an alternating score wipe the pavement with dead skin call out the blackest kettle his bones are brittle but he plays the only keys he knows while his friends are outside playing in the snow and oh the characters you'll find in a place like this infected rooms taint feng shui wounds we all love an original sin like this one, gods favorite son self taught in self made shoes he don't play no fucking showtunes but he sure can sing the blues and his song goes: "i'm tired of paying for the sins of a teenage kid when i've grown out of that shell and i've buried it deep if that boys all you see then baby you don't see me and i dig my state of mind cape and cowl is all you'll find there's no frightened little prick for you to pick apart now" come in baby, take a seat at the bar good looks like that in this town will take you as far as you wanna go just don't let em know about your secret don't ask me how i know but trust me i'll keep it i'll keep it to the grave doctor doctor can you help her? her chest is always feeling weak her eyes are crying all the time but there ain't no emergency she's always lonely and she can't figure out why she's got this trail of broken heart following behind her she is diagnosed two hearts within one made of gold, one black as sin eternally they struggle to define what she is inside so play a tune for me tell me everything in song i'll give you what you need to let yourself be strung along there's a part of me that needs to breed with young mens seeds of truth but theres a part of me that seems to only breathe to destroy you she can do it, i've seen it before left em crying, lying on the floor so don't play savior now it's a monster, that you can't slay it's all play or be played and she's going to make you hurt if you give her any worth yeah in theory she's "the one" but the curse can't be undone, no good father mother fucker what the fuck did you do? you're readin hieroglyphics even i can see it's bullshit but baby you never knew what's that you said about finality? who gave you the authority? who gave you that kind of control? i guess i did is being a good soul a hobby? something you just do on the side? cause i know the push the pull the tear all the abusive care is what really makes you feel alive and no one knows nothing bout eternity no matter how many films you watch and any notion you hold that you feel makes you right is just a crutch so stop, just stop but you can't stop, and you won't stop so i will i lost my head and she told me i looked good in a hat i loved her truly and she hated me for that i think i contradicted what she was taught by her dad that she would never deserve love and that was that still she kept me around to feel better about herself cause maybe if she had a good mans love on the shelf then she could be a good person after all but baby girl you always knew that shelf was gonna fall fuck you for being "the only one (that i could ever love)" quotations and parentheses surround emotions that should be long dead but they're not and instead i'm still pouring you another one fuck you and your devilish good looks that inspire my hooks and keep your hooks under my skin but now i'm cutting you off goddammit it's the last love song on this little planet and so now they sit on opposite ends of the bar hes drinking rum to rinse his eyes clean of the stars she smokes a cigarette and regrets their ever meeting and the black heart kept beating